Embrace #wholemama

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I learned last weekend, from a sex and relationships expert, that a hug that lasts for 20 seconds creates trust between the two people hugging.  Oxytocin is raised and a feeling of happiness and safety is emitted throughout the body.

I wonder if there is an equivalent to a 20 second hug for embracing myself.

I wrote yesterday about how I find it difficult to sit with my own thoughts.  My very wise, gentle and kind friend Twyla  left a thought provoking comment on that post:

Most people don’t like themselves enough to hang out with them. It’s in the silence we face the dark parts of ourselves, too, and have to make the deeper decision to love that me.

The truth is I don’t actually trust myself to make the deeper decision to love me in the dark parts and right now I’m scrambling to figure it out.

Am I prepared to embrace the woman who doesn’t always love as well as she wants to?  What about the woman who fears the changing seasons?  Can I embrace her?

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When does one find the time to sit with their own thoughts?  There is constant interruption from 7am until bed time and it’s hard enough to embrace that chaos let alone find a way to wade out of it for some personal reflection.  I’m already using these wee morning hours, the calm before the storm, to write.  I store up my quiet time for that.

Perhaps these words and the words that I keep secret in a journal are actually the way I sit with my deep, dark, inner self.  Each sentence another second in my self hug.  Teaching me happiness and safety.  Letting me know that I am trustworthy.

[bctt tweet=”I live in a buzzing hive of little ones, but right now it is a silent cave that I crave.”]

I live in a buzzing hive of little ones, but right now it is a silent cave that I crave. It must not be too cavernous though so my thoughts don’t echo all around me.

I hope that I am all at once strong enough and small enough to receive my embrace.

Linking this up with #wholemama today

 

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3 Comments

  • Gayl says:

    Sarah, you remind me that I need those times of silence. I read another article today talking about the need for getting alone with ourselves in the quiet, to nurture our souls, to address those areas that often get pushed beneath all the busyness. I know I need it, but even when I have the time I find it can still be hard to be still. “Am I prepared to embrace the woman who doesn’t always love as well as she wants to? What about the woman who fears the changing seasons? Can I embrace her?” Good questions! Blessings to you this week, Sarah!

  • I suppose it’s ok if we aren’t ready to embrace ourselves as long as we can rest in the fact that God is always ready to. I hope you find the quiet you need.

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