Desire #wholemama


photo credit: Skuff Marks via photopin (license)

We live in a desire driven world.  There is no escaping it.  To want is human.

I remember as a teenager wanting a pair of Doc Martens.  I didn’t just want the shoes, I wanted the status symbol and popularity I thought would come with them.  I saved for those shoes and I when I finally got them I  wore them everywhere.

One day I was at an outdoor family gathering.  Slightly high on the pride of my expensive trendy shoes I was quite flattered when one of my aunts wanted to try them on to see if she wanted a pair too. (I have two aunts who are quite close to me in age, so growing up they were more like super cool older cousins whose opinions I took very seriously).

I took off my precious shiny, black, chunky soled prized possessions that cost me nearly a whole paycheck from working at McDonald’s and handed them over to her.

Once my fancy footwear was out-of-the-way she promptly pushed me into the nearby pool.  Thankfully saving the Docs and effectively knocking me down a few dozen pegs.

My attachments were focused on something that was unworthy of having them.  My expensive shoes had blinded me and were the cause of me being turned into a fool.

Bestowing my affections on something so frivolous had cost me more than my time and money.

Desire and attachment cause suffering

[bctt tweet=”Desire and attachment cause suffering. “]

“Whoa Sarah, that’s a pretty crazy thing to say.”

I know, I know!  It’s radical to throw such a broad and bold statement out there, but I believe it’s true.  It’s why we need to be intentional about what we want, what we own and what we do.

Recently that same Aunt who pushed me into the pool bought a beautiful brand new truck.  Fresh off the lot.  She loved that truck, she bonded with that truck.  And then someone smashed the mirror off of it in a parking lot.

It sucks when something that you value gets broken.  It sucks when you work hard to pay for something that you desire, only to have it damaged.

It is disheartening when you find out that the thing you love is just a thing and can not love you back.

[bctt tweet=”It is disheartening when you find out that the thing you love is just a thing and can not love you back.”]

Shoes and trucks are just things.

Either we pine away for the things we want and grieve not having them, or we fear losing them once they are ours.  If I must suffer I want it to be over something worthy.

I apologize to my children.

I hash out feelings with my husband.

I chose to be vulnerable and confess my sins and weaknesses.

I do this because I have the highest esteem for relationships.  People are worthy of my heartbreak and suffering.  I desire deep meaningful connections with those I love.  My worry of somehow losing them  is outweighed by the benefits of having them and holding them now.

This post is being linked up at Overflow to contribute to the #wholemama community of blog posts.

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  • Thankful to have found your blog today. This post certainly uncovers the truth that we are perpetually hungry for something on this planet, and usually the thing we say we want is only a symbol for the deeper need that lurks behind it!

    • Sarah says:

      …”usually the thing we say we want is only a symbol for the deeper need that lurks behind it!” Wow! That phrase just pulled this who concept way deeper for me. I’m so thankful that you found my blog today as well.

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